John Clark Pro Se Blog Actor, Producer & Writer

Don’t Divorce Me! Kids’ Rules for Parents on Divorce

Posted in COMMENTARY-Passing parade, Links to Courts & Judges, Links to Media

This is HBO’s half-hour documentary, telling it from the kids’ point of view. It is being repeated through October, and should be watched.

Essentially, it is about hearing from the kids at home.

I haven’t seen it yet, but it apparently focuses on the points that parents planning on divorce should listen to their kids before acting on their own plans. “Tell me it’s not my fault,” “Don’t put me in the middle,” and “Don’t take your anger out on me.” are among the things that effected kids say. Sure.

Here’s a clip Don’t divorce me on HBO.

I have this to say about that:

What about in court? I don’t hear a word about the abysmal efforts of the “experts”, the divorce lawyers, child psychologists, children’s attorneys, child evaluators, who appear before ignorant, untrained be-robed judges in the culture of this country’s Family Court system.

At these palaces of misery, where most couples turn for help, nowhere is the child heard from by the court or the judge. Instead, experts give their impressions of the child with long written and oral reports, often with the effected child sitting there in front having to listen.

Children are swapped around like commodities to be traded, sometimes shipped off to foster homes, sometimes handed over to an abusing parent. Alienation is rife because it’s built-in to the dark hanging cloud of hostility. It’s the yellow fog of TS Elliot, that rubs its back upon the window-panes. It permeates everything, a silent killer, even in the most civilized of families.

Then what, in my opinion, is the answer?

It lies in forcing the parents, who loved and conceived together, into a cold guarded room, and not being allowed out until they come to a contractual agreement, legally enforceable with fines and jail-time. I think Jerry Springer shows the way, where open expression is encouraged, lawyers are banished, and which leads to raw honesty. And you know what? Children actually do understand and appreciate this, and should be allowed in on the action.

I wonder if HBO explored this highly controversial subject, and pulled out all the stops. We’ll see.